Near the Old Man of Storr, Scotland I took this in 2004

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Reality is Hard
Here are my petitions, the top one is the "newest" which is kicking a lot less time than the one below. The one blow is the original posting, and is finally doing well.

I went to the store earlier with a little list and left with nothing. I felt so sad. A poor man walked in. It's a cold day, he had on just a tattered sweater no coat. He had a little pull trolley, that was closed, in the hopeful anticipation of groceries to fill it with. He asked the young, clean attendant if they had any bread. She curtly told him they didn't and he could come back tomorrow. I wanted to cry. He was missing teeth. The store was a pharmacy. I thought it was odd he'd come there, but realized it's probably closest for him. I had planned on buying chocolate, if it had been on sale. It wasn't, and I felt guilty for having chocolate on my list and getting to choose to buy or not.

I put down my toothpaste, I was going to buy and left. As I walked outside, I watched the old man, walk slowly across the street, pulling his closed trolley, dejectedly behind him. I watched the brilliant pink and gold of the setting sunthe old man, hopeful that he might see the Philippino store which probably sold bread. I felt paralyzed to help.

And then there was a dog, howling, I've just called Toronto Animal Services. I think she's been kept outside all fucking day without any shelter. James, the- all -too nonchalant- man I spoke to said they would either send someone tonight or tomorrow. I will follow it up tomorrow and see what was going on.

Sometimes I feel like leaving my house, just walking outside, is the most difficult thing in the world; if you're sensitive. You get instantly bombarded by painful realities. It's not an option, though, to never join society again, because then what of all the beings who need our help?