Near the Old Man of Storr, Scotland I took this in 2004

Friday, March 5, 2010

Bullshit



Question: If someone told you that they hoped you'd
get hit by a bus how would you feel?

I know how I felt when it was said to me earlier today by none other than my
psychotic sister.

And right before that hateful scenario was wished upon me , the "c-word", among other words, was hurled at me, full throttle, I might add. It's the one that rhymes with blunt.
This person, who feels that I am her emotional and psychological punching bag, is not some kid. No, she's nearly 40 years old.

And once her personal storm is over she thinks everything's ok, and treats me like nothing happened, and often uses a voice that is so damn condescending, (I think this is the word I want.) I feel beyond rage and she calmly says shit like, "Why are you always so angry?" As a control tactic, I've finally figured that out.
What the fuck?!

Most people should never have been born, and she is on the top of the list, as far as I'm concerned, as a huge, psychotic mistake.

This is on the heels of International Women's Day. The irony, huh?

Why, you may be wondering, am I blogging about this? Because I can't keep this to myself anymore. I don't know which is worse, feeling terrified by her crazy temper, or isolated because of it.

It's debilitating to get treated like shit so often, and to have no one know or believe me. The people in my family who have seen her rage or listen to me 'complain' about it, always have an excuse for why she acted in such a manner.

I don't want to hear any more excuses! Not one.

Most people who know her think she's swell. That's cuz if she showed her friends her evilness she'd have no one. So, she figures she can take out her rage on me, primarily, because I am only a relative.

Today I have decided to no longer be quiet. That's why I've written this.